General
When your friends are sick...
October 30, 2022
in General
When you've made plans with people, if they are sick, how do you deal with it? Do you make it clear ahead of time that people need to let you know if they are sick?
Do you ask people to wear masks? Or do you just decide not to go? Or do you go (like to their house) but just keep your distance?
How do you explain these things to people nicely, or do you just not worry about it and go with the flow?
Asking for a friend-j/k--I'm asking for me. 🤣
I'd like to find a happy medium, so I'm polling the audience. Thanks friends!
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1 - 7 of 7 Replies
Transplant Patient
Depends on the friend and the event. I make it clear if someone feels sick at all, even if they think it’s just allergies, to let me know. Depending on the severity of their symptoms we might carry on with plans as usual, just with social distancing and/or masking, move it outside or reschedule.
my thing is I cannot give informed consent to participating in this relationship without the necessary knowledge to keep me safe, which includes knowing if someone is sick.
I haven't seen anyone outside my family since my transplant. All of my family knows (and respects) if they have any symptom, or feel "off" in any way they are not to be around me. My sister is an ophthalmologist, and still masks at work, and she double masks if she comes into my house but most of our social engagements since my transplant have been outdoor. My son, who is in second grade, still wears a mask at school. It's very hard for him, he is the only person in the school still wearing a mask (which, is so hard for me to even understand). So far, we escaped the elementary school virus that took out about 3/4 of the school, according to the principal. I've had two rounds of Thymo in the last 10 weeks so we have been over-cautious. My MIL seems to think that I should live at home for the rest of my lift, and I am extremely extroverted so that doesn't sound like "living" to me. Luckily my care team agrees, but wants me to be very conservative considering its cold/flu/covid season right now. My close friends know that I will be very prone to common illness and could cancel at the last minute out of pure caution.
All that being said, I am curious what everyone's answers are and the main reason for commenting was to also get the data from everyone else. :)
Transplant Patient
@Shelbycreates - absolutely, I will always ask if everyone is healthy AND I will let people know to please be masked up - if there are plans for them to visit me at my house. If I've been invited someplace, if it's a large gathering, I usually decline. If it's a small/intimate gathering, I will inquire about the safety precautions (if any - mostly these days, there are none). If no one is in fact (seemingly) under the weather, I may decide to go, fully masked and prepared to hang out socially distanced (which is not always easy because of space limitations etc).
Overall, most of my 'friends' and ALL of my family are fully aware of my situation and lucky for me, they're considerate & respectful.
Transplant Patient
Good luck to you! It sounds like you're making excellent choices given the situation. Also, glad to hear about your (mostly) supportive family. Living with school age kids in the home is definately a challenge, especially these days with the Flu, RSV, Monkey Pox & of course the mega beast, COVID.
I completely agree with you, we mustn't let our guard down - this winter could prove to be quite challenging. That said, I hope & pray you, me and other's in this predicament don't have to live a life of seclusion (& exclusion, really).
Take care, stay safe & be well.
Transplant Patient
Good luck to you! It sounds like you're making excellent choices given the situation. Also, glad to hear about your (mostly) supportive family. Living with school age kids in the home is definitely a challenge, especially these days with the Flu, RSV, Monkey Pox & of course the mega beast, COVID.
I completely agree with you, we mustn't let our guard down - this winter could prove to be quite challenging. That said, I hope & pray you, me and other's in this predicament don't have to live a life of seclusion (& exclusion, really).
Take care, stay safe & be well.
Transplant Patient
Love your response! Take care, stay safe & be well.
@AliEm14 I love this response about informed consent. It's so good. I think I make it hard on myself because there's far less I'd be comfortable with personally, but I don't want my kids to miss out on things with other people--especially if we have to travel together to go there. I know there are better ways to do this for myself. It's a matter of making the decisions ahead of time and weighing out potential consequences. Thanks!